I am loved

I can feel vignetted edges

of broken promises

claw and climb out from my mouth.
They leap like little larks 
needing nourishment

craving ease from this punishment
of separation from my Divinity.

I am wrapped in a hunger I don’t fully comprehend
but fly around the fairy tales I thought I’d eventually find.

Wake up this time!


No need to make up reasons,

shut out the raging tease i
n your belly
craving
drama 

diving
deeper in the trauma
of addicted connection.

These juicy moments distract me fully
even though you could never really love me.
There are fantasies clinging to these
 clotted heart beats

hidden in the closet of my older brothers room.

That’s a story Im pushing through.

I thought he hurt me because he hated me but I can see

in these reforming memories,

it was his way of
stealthily
stealing
something
he did not understand but needed none the less.
So he basked freely
in the golden Light,
once pure presence,
shining from my eyes
without my permission.

Stories of my King held me upright through years of lies.
I stand on broken limbs, here, wanting something I have not yet earned
and yet yearned for from those moments of safety usually conditioned daily as a baby
but my father kept forgetting where he set me down.


Beloved,
believe me,
where ever you are,
I’m fighting to be the best of Me.
Giving to this Life all I can be,
returning,
ruthless
, relentless

towards the sunrise

each time the moon’s trickery
did some pretty shitty things to me.
I will still fall in love,
just in case.

It takes a powerful heart to stay in these moments of grace.
Sunset trusting,
maybe
this time,
that reflecting globe shining Light mercilessly
on my skin,
can heal the half of me whole.
Here, in this moment
as my realities destiny unfolds
and I open to the unknown,
what I I do know,

I am Love.
I am Lovable.
I am Loved.

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